Monday, January 10, 2011

Dressers: Metaphors for Life

 This is my dresser.  While cleaning today I decided to shove the Netflix disc we never use into my top drawer because that's where stuff goes when I don't know where it goes.  Then I looked at it and realized: this is my life.  Look how neat and normal the top of my dresser looks.  I rarely have a huge mess on TOP of my dresser but my entire life I've had a top drawer just like this one.  No one sees that mess.  What is in there anyways?  I was so ashamed I shut the drawer so I couldn't even tell you.
Once again, picture has nothing to do with post except look at the apron my mom bought Lennon!
 An example of this was yesterday.  Church is at 1 pm so no more excuses about being late.  Except when one of your children poops in the tub around 12:30 pm.  Then suddenly both kids are screaming in the shower and you're trying to flat iron your hair while holding the door shut to keep them in.  Then while your husband re-washes them you argue over who will dispose of the poop.

Me: So when you're done washing their hair, you can clean up the poop and I'll get them dressed.
Tod: (laughing) No...your responsibility is to take care of the kids and all their feces.

Me: Right except I always take care of their feces so today's my day off.

Tod cleans up the poop.  The smell is so bad because can we all agree that a tub full of poop is much worse than a diaper?
Then as we're heading out the door, Lennon asks me,

"Mom, do you need to pinch a loaf?"

Excuse me?

"DOOOO YOOOOUUUU NEEEEEED to PIIIINNNNCH a LLLLOOOAF?"

TOD!

Yet we walk into church appearing to be clean and no one can hear the shouting match over poo just moments earlier.  Isn't that weird?  Top of the dresser clean, inside of the drawers a disaster.

11 comments:

Ryan Smart said...

First off-1 o'clock church-worst thing ever. Secondly, I'm sure my drawer would look like that if I didn't have a wife that took care of it. The question is, do you think it's better to have the top of your dresser dirty or the drawer? I kinda believe the fake it til you make rule-I mean at least we know you care. If your kids pooped on the church floor and you looked like a crazy person when you came in--I'd worry more.

MediocreMama said...

See Ryan...I am supposed to be the wife that takes care of it. Somehow I can keep my kitchen clean but not my top drawer. Plus several other drawers in the house.

Heath Banbury said...

so did yo need to pinch a loaf or what? LOL. Your blog always makes me laugh. good job.

Kristin said...

Good thing you hid all those Thunder Down Under ads you clipped and saved under something else before taking that picture. ;)

kristi said...

the top drawer problem might just be a 'Lowell' thing. Along with spilling food when we eat and making a big mess of toothpaste on our faces when we brush our teeth. Why don't these things happen to anyone else?

MediocreMama said...

Heath: Of course I didn't. Sick.

Kristin: Of course I did. Duh.

Kristi: I am laughing so hard right now. When we first got married Tod was like, "Can't you brush your teeth without getting toothpaste all over your mouth?" I didn't realize that was possible.

Megan said...

Good post. My top drawer is fairly clean with the exception of the bottom right corner. That is where my 'things I don' know what to do with' go. Like the Karma Sutra Zandy Bands we got at Clay's work party. I don't want Monet giving one of her friends a missionary position Zandy Band.

Scarlett poo's in the tub regularly. Like once a week. Luckily her poo is solid. I simply pick it up and put it in the toilet and flush. And replace the bath water of course. :) Easy clean up.

That apron on Lennon is too cute. And so is his crazy picture face!

Pinch a loaf!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my gosh. Tod Tod Tod.

liz said...

Kristi & Holly, it must be a knight thing because zach says the exact same thing to me about the toothpaste.

And.... Your post totally spoke to me.

Sarah said...

Someone told me at church (we have one o'clock too) that I always look so put together. My reply, "Oh, if you only knew." I think most of us have messy top drawers from time to time.

Carolee said...

Ooops I think I have 3 of those drawers in my house...

P.S. (poo side-note) One morning when Jared was leaving for work he noticed Drew leaving the bathroom and asked..."Drew did you go potty? And Drew replied: Yay! I took a dump!!" Husbands are killer

ericareynolds said...

I never let ANYONE look in my drawers. I try not to look in them too. Also, I tell my kids that we don't poo on the Sabbath. It's not righteous. Kidding.