Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Two year old for sale

I know what you're thinking -- with all the two year olds out there, why should I buy him?
First and most important -- star power. Right now his hair is amazingly similar to Kevin Bacon's in Footloose.

Shameless -- the other day he had the loudest, most offensive sounding bowel movement in history while a maintenance man and I stood right outside the door as I explained what was wrong with the dishwasher. Grunts, groans, everything.
Resourceful -- no pockets?

No problem.

Smart -- shoves his little brother only when he thinks no one is looking.

Creative -- I would never have thought to put whole toilet rolls inside the toilet. Always thinking, always creating...

Artistic -- did you know that four viles of food coloring on brand new carpet only come out after hours of scrubbing/drying/scrubbing/drying and that the antidote is WHITE VINEGAR? (more on that here)


Spontaneous -- without thinking, he emptied this entire bottle of shaving cream. On a whim.
FREE SAME DAY DELIVERY. Call now.

12 comments:

Meegan said...

laughed hard. totally made up for the tears I shed from the previous post. Holly. You amaze me.

Ryan Smart said...

Is it bad that I don't want to buy him, but I would love to hang out with him everyday? He needs a reality show. I just hope you have more patience for him than you did with the Utah Jazz Bear at Homecoming.

Brooke said...

Shaving cream and dye make me happy that Europeans don't have carpet... all tile here luckily.

kklowell said...

I'll take him. No questions asked.

Leah Miller said...

My house is already a wreck from my two year old. It can't get any worse. Send him here.

Megan said...

Those underwear shots are too much. SO FUNNY! The shaving cream AND the food coloring on the carpet. Clayton would die. He sees a spec on the carpet and gets out the stain remover. Lennon is looking so old in these pics. We can't wait to see them!

Jon and Ali said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jon and Ali said...

Hmmmm...maybe...I just have a few questions. First, will he stay put in a Laundry basket?

How much does a two year old go on the black market these days?

I'll have to get back to you on this.

淑君 said...

the baby so cute...^_^

Rick said...

Rick

The dye reminds me of me opening a can of my grandparents red paint. My grandfather got the job of cleaning up the paint off of the utility room floor and my grandmother got the job of cleaning me up in the bathtub. I remember that my grandfather was laughing a lot when my grandmother was not looking.

Carol said...

That Lennon . . . always a source of amusement. He's just the most inquisitive little creature. LOL! It's obvious he's ready for Preschool ~ our little mischief maker, super hero, also has artistic genius!! He has SO MANY craft ideas ... do you think he's looking for attention or is he just curious? Lucky you haven't got pets...it could get really ugly. :)

Loriann Jensen said...

hahahaha. You can throw my 2 year old in to sweeten the deal. It could be a two-fer.